After I cleaned up my mindset, there are only a few reality shows I will watch now - Queer Eye, Shark Tank, and Project Runway. I have always loved the creativity of high fashion.
And sure, hasn’t every princess ALSO dreamed of becoming a runway model?
On Project Runway, whenever the pressure is on and the contestants are trying to figure out creating an outfit, there’s always a time when Tim Gunn pops into the workroom to advise and council - basically, he’s like their fashion coach.
His signature line is this…
“Make it work.”
Make it into reality.
Or as my client, who just went from $25K months to $50K months says, “Just fucking do it.”
And that’s exactly it.
That’s exactly why my client’s income doubled while working together.
He just fucking did the work.
He made it work.
In fact, even if...
Have you ever looked for that next thing to “complete” you? Maybe it was another certification or degree? Or that ONE magic thing that you need that will CHANGE EVERYTHING?
Maybe it’s another course, or another coach or another THING- something outside of you that you THINK you need to “fix” you.
And I gotta tell ya... you’re looking in all the wrong spots.
There is no magic cure.
There is no fix.
There is no one coach, no one program, no one guru, no one book, no one tool, no one solution to “fix” you or your business.
You have everything you need inside of you right now.
True transformation, true change only comes from one place - YOU.
I spent nearly three decades of my life trying to be that “thing” for someone else - my dad. Maybe if I was skinny enough? Maybe if I was smart enough? Maybe if I got enough good grades? Then he’d change.
None of that worked.
One of the greatest...
One of the trends I absolutely hate in my industry as a coach is seeing coaches with LITTLE TO NO business experience in their coaching business, suddenly turns into a “business coach” because they realized it was more lucrative.
Yet, they had no past successful business...and no proven results of what works.
They have no track record or results.
So they give their clients all this busy-work - post on social media, rebrand, build your website, show up on Insta Stories every single day, do podcasts, and do more podcasts, launch a Youtube channel, provide value
...so much value
...tons of value
...without truly knowing the business.
They spit out regurgitated info with fancy acronyms like I.C.A. and K.P.I.’s and use catch-all phrases out of business development books.
But they’re still stuck making 3-4 figures a month. Wah. Wah.
They sure are good at giving out STUFF to do though. You’ll be busier than ever with them.
But will you...
Ever worry that what you’re putting out into the world isn’t “perfect”? I mean, god forbid you to have a typo or grammatical error in anything - let alone the button on your checkout page.
Now, I can write, but grammar ain’t my specialty. Pretty much all my clients know this.
Sometimes my brain - like right now - writes faster than my computer has time to catch up.
In NLP, I’m what you call, highly kinesthetic. It’s an empath thing. I’m more about the feeling of the words than the actual spelling of words.
And, because when you write on the computer you are looking down into your kinesthetic and auditory digital representational systems your computer work can come from a place of feeling and making sure that things “make sense.”
So as long as the words have the right FEEL and make SENSE, I literally don’t SEE a problem, you follow?
That’s why I don’t actually...
Ever caught yourself in massive comparison mode? Like everyone seems to be doing SO much better than you, for some crazy reason and you’re wondering…
“What’s wrong with me?” #BeenthereDoneThat
Comparison - division - is just Fear in a new outfit.
The ego looooooves to make ourselves appear “separate” from one another - divided.
As if she can have it, but I can’t.
Or it works for them, those people, out there, but not for you.
Whenever you doubt or catch fear clutching you by the throat again about your future, or your success...
Cheer on someone else’s success.
Seriously, wish them well in ALL the ways from the depths of your soul.
Celebrate TF out of what they have accomplished and as you do, train your brain to know this by heart...
“I can have/do ____________ too.”
This trains your subconscious mind to recognize that that GOAL, that dream, that thing you are working towards us...
The number one thing most of my clients come to me for is not to build their business or boost their productivity.
It’s to have FREEDOM.
Freedom inside their empire...
...Instead of being a slave to their laptop.
...Instead of being beholden to some other boss.
...Instead of being trapped in their mind of frustration, guilt, anger, and all the “shoulds” other people have projected onto them.
Most people are just looking for freedom in all the wrong places.
They look for it out there -
Maybe if I just do this new diet or new marketing strategy, THEN, I’ll get freedom in my business.
Maybe if I just have THAT car or THAT bag or that thing, then I’ll get freedom through other people’s approval of how cool I am.
Maybe if I just get MORE words of affirmation, MORE validation from others that my work is valid, real, true, THEN, I will feel free.
Maybe if I just get more sales or make more money, or get a...
Ever think "I should have more followers?" Or, “I should have more people on my list?” Or, “I should be making more money in my business?”
Then you may also be experiencing feelings of…
Overwhelm, anxiety, frustration, resentment, holding back tears, or screams, or rails at the high heavens for why are they so much farther along than you.
Should-ing is soul-sucking.
If you’re stuck in comparison, beating yourself up for not being where you "should" be vs. where you are, showing up on social media...and, heck, just building a business can SUCK.
Should-ing anything is contractive energy that ain't nobody got time for.
Least of all you. And especially not your customers.
Everything is energy, after all.
And we feel it when you're putting on a show or trying to be like someone else, or posting with a ton of "shoulds."
Your audience is smart. Like you.
And we KNOW, even when we can’t put our finger on it when showing up is...
Personal development 101, psychoanalysis, neuroscience - all require looking inward. You see it all over the interwebs, influencers are citing positive inspirational, reflective quotes, things to make you think.
But is it just more shit to consume or is it, Soul?
Messaging requires you to message - to put your message out there. To share and serve with whatever message comes through.
You’re not looking inward when you’re looking outward for likes, followers, or for people to be dazzled by your insight.
You cannot serve two masters.
It’s your mission and message.
Or it’s other people’s approval of what you say/do/think.
There is no grey zone.
It’s either inward or outward. Otherwise, you get cross-eyed.
Divine downloads, creation, messages, ideas come THROUGH you, for you and for the service of your world.
You’re either serving with those insights or having those likes serve...
It's not perfect, this journey.
There are moments worthy of puffy eyes, release, pain, struggle, triumph, challenge, championship, figuring it out, and all the above combined into the span of 90 seconds sometimes.
But it is in those moments of crashing, burning, finding, releasing, allowing that allows for all the pieces to come together.
You got this, puffy eyes or not.
You don’t have to put it out in the world - but perfect doesn’t sell and it PAYS to be human.
As Captain Marvel shows us, the benefit of being human is that we have forged an unshakable resilience to get back up again...
And every time we stand up, FOR ourselves, FOR something greater than use, FOR love, FOR more...
You strengthen the resilience within us, which, when forged, exercised in the throws of "too much," stress, overwhelm, pain, struggle, choice, choosing, and redeciding, recommitting to that vision.
“Once I get my degree, then I’ll start my Youtube channel and posting more on social media.”
“I’m curious, how have you been able to get your degree?”
“Well...I studied and practiced.”
Putting content out there on the interwebs is the same thing - it too is a muscle the needs to be strengthened, toned, worked on.
All social media profiles were flabby, small, and weak at one point too.
Those that have grown have grown because the leader chose to strengthen them.”
All the things you want to create in this world take disciplined work.
Notice I didn’t say HARD.
I said DISCIPLINED.
It is a practice, like going to the gym.
And when you’re at the gym, as you go, more and...