A former Miss Congeniality, powered by green juice, Italian espresso, and gallons of glitter, I am proud to have helped hundreds of leaders build their empires, breakthrough their self-limiting beliefs, revolutionize their relationships, and rewrite their stories of self-sabotage into a story of success, in all areas of their life.
For as long as I can remember I’ve been obsessed with stories of women who go from rags to riches, from fear to success, and vice versa. What separates those who cave in to their circumstances while others climb to the top?
As a child I always was attracted to powerful female human characters…mainly princesses…who ruled with passion, purpose, and who pioneered their own path. Every movie. Every book. Every bedtime story. My mom even had to dig deep into the bowels of library literature from ye olden days to find new princess stories. I couldn’t get enough of them. I was fascinated by their humanity, despite their royal status.
I hid inside these characters and buried myself in my imagination to escape the truth of what was going on at home. Addiction ran rampant in my house: my dad the addict, my mom the quintessential codependent. It was then, as a child when I made the decision to be an actress.
I acted like I was fine when I wasn’t. I acted happy when all I wanted to do was cry. I acted healthy when all I wanted to do was puke. I started doing a dangerous dance at 9 with bulimia, body image issues, and blame that lasted 10 years. The funny thing is, most people thought I had my shit together…like really well. And, yet, I soldiered on with my story of "being the victim," blaming others for my pain.
I created this powerful story in my mind that affected every part of me - my career, my relationships, and my relationship with my body. I believed I was broken. So I continued to break off pieces of me to fit into other people’s molds of what I thought they wanted me to be. I was a chameleon. Adapting to survive.
So I constantly had to PROVE myself. Prove my “enoughness.” And, man, did I get a gold star for going after achievements, grasping for proof.
Screenwriting, Pilates, acting entrepreneurship, musical theater, fitness, film production, women’s issues, building orphanages in India, and beauty pageants (well, that was mostly because I liked the crowns).
My first film, BRO', which I co-wrote starred Danny Trejo + was bought by Lionsgate. I became a certified Pilates instructor, was named "Pilates Pro" by Oxygen magazine, and started my own studio, Fitness with Kim for ten years. I competed in Miss CA USA, won Miss Congeniality and had a whole bunch of other Miss titles. I acted in London at a prestigious school in roles I’d dreamed of performing. I was the president + spokeswoman of a quarter-of-a-million-dollar e-commerce startup that sold a back stretching device. We got featured in all the major fitness magazines, on the billboards of New York Times Square, and I pitched it to the first round of "Shark Tank" auditions. I ran marathons. Not a bad start, eh?
But even after all my successes, I still didn’t feel like enough.
Because during every single one of my successes, I sabotaged it by either deflecting to berating my body or deflecting to a defective relationship. So for every inch of career success I got, I took two steps back. For every acting success, I would obsess over how I needed to be skinnier. For my success as a screenwriter, I was in several bad romantic relationships, which took my attention away from continuing to grow down that path. For every fitness success, I would sabotage with overwhelm and work, stopping the very habits that helped me feel good. For every entrepreneurial success, I felt less and less aligned, even resentful for starting that business. I neglected countless opportunities from fear.
Codependency. Deflection. EnoughnessEscapism. Perfectionism. But what each of these really boils down to is fear. Fear of success. Fear of wholeness. And those made me self-sabotage back to the start. Because achieving wholeness + success was never something I was taught or shown. That's when I realized...
In fact, I was plagiarizing my entire life. I was imitating the language, behavior, and thoughts of others and acting as if they were my own. Thoughts like not being enough, or that I needed to sacrifice my health for success, or that I had to be perfect before I could achieve my goals, or that I had to have "issues" (because everyone does, right?), permeated my existence.
I created this story in my mind that completely limited me from experiencing holistic success. It was then that I realized my power of choice. I could choose to continue feeding my story, focusing on my limitations, blaming other people - family, bad boyfriends, society, my upbringing, - and everything for my choices. Or I could take my power back. It was my choice to create a story to limit myself.
That meant it was also my choice to change my story.
And from my 15+ years of solving problems as an entrepreneur, I knew that there are thousands of people struggling with the same plagiarized beliefs, the same self-sabotage, the same feeling that they had no choice, that they are broken, and that hating your body, having bad relationships, and missing out on opportunities with the excuses that it's "just the way life is."
Maybe they hadn't stuck their finger down their throat, but they constantly compared their body to other women. Maybe they hadn't dated a drug-dealing felon who robbed their family, but they were stuck on a rollercoaster of a relationship that prevented them from focusing on their business. Maybe they hadn't faced a barrage of lawyers to fight over keeping a company, but they have had team members who didn't value their contribution. Maybe they hadn't grown up with an addict for a dad, but they spent their lives blaming other people, other situations, and other things for never having the results they truly desired for their lives. I know because I was stuck in the same crappy cycle of perfecting, deflecting, escaping, co-depending, and fearing, for 18 years.
And if you're still reading...
Once I did, everything shifted. I left an industry I thought was my dream. I left several men and family members I loved, only to find and create a better family. I chose to stop settling for second best or being treated second rate, anymore, by anyone...including myself.
I started loving my body. I met + married my best friend. Spent six weeks in Italy on our honeymoon. We've wine tasted around the world. Ran a few half marathons with my hubby, and a couple full marathons on my own. Co-wrote a #1 Amazon Bestselling Book, The Start: Journey to Entrepreneurship. Got certified as a Master Coach in Neurolinguistic Programming, Time Line Therapy®, and Hypnosis. Started to scale my coaching business when I was 7 months pregnant. Had a baby...naturally...and on a Netflix docuseries, Chicken Soup for the Soul's Being Dad. Got 13+ additional certifications in Certified High Performance Coaching,B.A.N.K. Sales Methodology, Biodynamic Breathwork and Trauma Release, Somatic Attachment Theory, reiki,TEDx Talk and many more. Packed for three weeks to travel to Australia in March 2020, at the beginning of the pandemic, and chose to stay to live our dream life abroad as digital nomads for two years, subsequently doubled my business (again!), doubled our profit margin (twice!). Surmounted epic grief after losing four family members and two family friends, including my dad, in the span of 3 years. And, free birthed my second son in a bathtub during lockdown with my midwife coaching me on the phone as she raced to my side, while my husband caught our baby. Gave a TEDx talk, while in Australia (crazy!)...Oh, and then manifested our dream home, complete with donkeys and goats outside of Austin, TX.
And I'm just getting started.
Oh, and I realized I am freaking Wonder Woman.
The Divinely given power we have is immeasurable. And we're barely scratching the surface.
The thing is, though, it's up to you to embrace it. You have to choose. And with that choice, comes all the responsibility that goes with it. Because being at Cause for your life takes guts. Sometimes it gets really hard when you stop the blame game and realize that no one else is at Cause for your life (and your results) but you.
Get the sovereign sitch on the Spencers.
I dropped out of college two weeks before I was supposed to start with 2 scholarships. I've since built 4 multi-6-figure businesses consulted and coached multi-millionaire founders and NASA employees, trained employees for multi-billion dollar corporations, and worked with 4 Ph.D. clients...all with a high school diploma.
I was sexually abused by my father when I was a child. My father was sexually abused by his mother. And my grandma was sexually abused as well. I don't know how far back the cycle of abuse goes, but I do know for damn sure, I broke the f*cking cycle.
I landed my first TEDx while living abroad in Australia, LIVE in front of an audience...in the middle of a pandemic! (There were, like, no cases in Queensland, so it was all incredibly safe.)
I used to be an exercise-induced asthmatic. I've now run 7 marathons. I couldn't run a mile to save my life. Now I've run 7 marathons, and 3 half marathons and am training for another one.
I battled bulimia for a decade and recovered with no psychological or medical intervention. I transformed so much that I loved my body through 2X natural pregnancies and childbirths and married a chef, and have never felt more beautiful, even at my current heaviest weight (which, really, ain't that much.)
I co-wrote a hardcore motocross movie called, BRO', filled with drugs, sex, and violence. That story has saved 3 lives (that I know of), proving that you never know the power of keeping it real and raw in your story.
After being bought out of my e-commerce startup in 2014, I had let myself believe I wasn't good at business, forgetting that my first entrepreneurial venture was at 5 selling bags of glitter water to my neighbors. I was split-testing price points of 5¢ or $50 before even knowing what that was. I've since changed my tune and have made more money in a month than I did in that buyout.
I staged my father's intervention for alcohol, who had been an addict for 50 years. He remained sober from alcohol until the day he died in 2021. Two months before he passed, he proudly declared, "Kimmy, I'm 4 years sober." It was one of his proudest accomplishments. And it's one of mine too.
I used to believe I was damaged, broken, and a victim. I now know I am whole, powerfully loved, and the co-creator of my reality. I've never felt more powerful, fully supported by my Creator, and free.
Interested in my fancy-pants credentials or to interview? Click here.
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