âDo you fling yourself off a cliff and expect to fly to Hawaii?â I asked my client.
She stared at me perplexedly, âUm...no...I would die.â
âExactly!â I exclaimed.Â
You see...
Having worked with 5,6, and 7-figure entrepreneurs for the past 4 years, and having been an entrepreneur for the past 12 years, Iâve found the number one reason why people start their own businesses - freedom.
Hey, it was my reason too.Â
So the entrepreneur flings herself off the cliff with the Braveheart-worthy battle cry of FREEEEEEEEEEDOM into the wide world of entrepreneurship, expecting just thatâŠ
Only to be surprised by the crash landing on the rocks below.Â
So she picks herself up, wringing her hands through her hair as to âwhy God, whyâ is she not feeling even a smidge free.Â
Why does everyone else on Instagram seem to be doing sooooo much better than me?
Why is so and so-and-so so much more successful?Â
And then, the idea dawns...
She picks herself back up off that rock of failed attempts to c...
Remember back in 2007 when that recession hit?Â
I had just started freelancing as a Pilates instructor. I was working primarily at one studio and within one year, I had become the highest paid, youngest instructor at the studio.Â
I went from making smoothies at BodyWorks for $8.75 an hour to a $55,000 year! I was enraptured!Â
âSo this is what big-time feel like?â I thought. Haha.Â
Awww, what a cute little entrepreneur I was back then.Â
But hereâs the other thought I continued to think that served me POWERFULLY throughout a decade of entrepreneurship.Â
What recession?Â
Exactly.Â
I heard people talking about it. I remember hearing my parents mentioning it a few times. I knew it was something âout there.â I had just simply, consciously or unconsciously, decided it wasnât going to be IN HERE.
You know, up in my mind.Â
I was UNAVAILABLE for anything less than profit and prosperity.Â
And I continued to profit, prosper and work my ass off 10 hours a day, loving what I didâŠuntil I d...
âWhy would anyone want to hire me? There are so many others in my industry. I just feel like I donât compare.â
âYouâre right,â I said.
Her mouth dropped open. I donât think my client was expecting me to agree with her when she was so used to me challenging her excuses.Â
âYour industry is rapidly growing,â I continued, âAnd, yes, there are definitely people way ahead of you, making more money, with larger followings.â
âSo how do I break through?â she asked. I could feel her frustration through the Zoom screen.
âPerhaps thatâs the wrong question. Let me ask you this...
Why did you hire me?â
Without even a pause, âWell, your energy, and your background, and how youâve helped other people. I just felt like you would GET me.â
Look...
Iâve polled enough clients and received enough testimonials to know that it is not about how much money I have made, how many credentials I have earned, how many blogs I put out, how many things I do that is why people work with me.
Never.Â
In any in...
After I cleaned up my mindset, there are only a few reality shows I will watch now - Queer Eye, Shark Tank, and Project Runway. I have always loved the creativity of high fashion.Â
And sure, hasnât every princess ALSO dreamed of becoming a runway model?Â
On Project Runway, whenever the pressure is on and the contestants are trying to figure out creating an outfit, thereâs always a time when Tim Gunn pops into the workroom to advise and council - basically, heâs like their fashion coach.Â
His signature line is thisâŠ
âMake it work.âÂ
Make it into reality.Â
Or as my client, who just went from $25K months to $50K months says, âJust fucking do it.âÂ
And thatâs exactly it.
Thatâs exactly why my clientâs income doubled while working together.
He just fucking did the work.
He made it work.
In fact, even if you do, something will invariably throw you off that âplanâ so you have to innovate.Â
You make it...
Have you ever looked for that next thing to âcompleteâ you? Maybe it was another certification or degree? Or that ONE magic thing that you need that will CHANGE EVERYTHING?Â
Maybe itâs another course, or another coach or another THING- something outside of you that you THINK you need to âfixâ you.
And I gotta tell ya... youâre looking in all the wrong spots.Â
There is no magic cure.
There is no fix.
There is no one coach, no one program, no one guru, no one book, no one tool, no one solution to âfixâ you or your business.Â
You have everything you need inside of you right now.
True transformation, true change only comes from one place - YOU.Â
I spent nearly three decades of my life trying to be that âthingâ for someone else - my dad. Maybe if I was skinny enough? Maybe if I was smart enough? Maybe if I got enough good grades? Then heâd change.Â
None of that worked.Â
One of the greatest mistakes I see with high achievers, is they look for that next âthing.â
Something they can ...
One of the trends I absolutely hate in my industry as a coach is seeing coaches with LITTLE TO NO business experience in their coaching business, suddenly turns into a âbusiness coachâ because they realized it was more lucrative.
Yet, they had no past successful business...and no proven results of what works.
They have no track record or results.Â
So they give their clients all this busy-work - post on social media, rebrand, build your website, show up on Insta Stories every single day, do podcasts, and do more podcasts, launch a Youtube channel, provide value
...so much value
...tons of value
...without truly knowing the business.Â
They spit out regurgitated info with fancy acronyms like I.C.A. and K.P.I.âs and use catch-all phrases out of business development books.
But theyâre still stuck making 3-4 figures a month. Wah. Wah.Â
They sure are good at giving out STUFF to do though. Youâll be busier than ever with them.Â
But will you actually get transformative results?Â
Like...
Ever worry that what youâre putting out into the world isnât âperfectâ? I mean, god forbid you to have a typo or grammatical error in anything - let alone the button on your checkout page.
Now, I can write, but grammar ainât my specialty. Pretty much all my clients know this.Â
Sometimes my brain - like right now - writes faster than my computer has time to catch up.Â
In NLP, Iâm what you call, highly kinesthetic. Itâs an empath thing. Iâm more about the feeling of the words than the actual spelling of words.
And, because when you write on the computer you are looking down into your kinesthetic and auditory digital representational systems your computer work can come from a place of feeling and making sure that things âmake sense.âÂ
So as long as the words have the right FEEL and make SENSE, I literally donât SEE a problem, you follow?Â
Thatâs why I donât actually visually recall typos. In order for me to do so, I would have to hold my computer sl
...Ever caught yourself in massive comparison mode? Like everyone seems to be doing SO much better than you, for some crazy reason and youâre wonderingâŠ
âWhatâs wrong with me?â #BeenthereDoneThat
Comparison - division - is just Fear in a new outfit.Â
The ego looooooves to make ourselves appear âseparateâ from one another - divided.
As if she can have it, but I canât.
Or it works for them, those people, out there, but not for you.
Look...
Whenever you doubt or catch fear clutching you by the throat again about your future, or your success...
Cheer on someone elseâs success.Â
Seriously, wish them well in ALL the ways from the depths of your soul.
Celebrate TF out of what they have accomplished and as you do, train your brain to know this by heart...
âI can have/do ____________ too.â
This trains your subconscious mind to recognize that that GOAL, that dream, that thing you are working towards us CLOSE...itâs so fucking close.Â
I literally did this at a Grace Lever event last yea...
The number one thing most of my clients come to me for is not to build their business or boost their productivity.
Ultimately...
Itâs to have FREEDOM.
Freedom inside their empire...
...Instead of being a slave to their laptop.
...Instead of being beholden to some other boss.
...Instead of being trapped in their mind of frustration, guilt, anger, and all the âshouldsâ other people have projected onto them.Â
Most people are just looking for freedom in all the wrong places.
They look for it out there -Â
Maybe if I just do this new diet or new marketing strategy, THEN, Iâll get freedom in my business.Â
Maybe if I just have THAT car or THAT bag or that thing, then Iâll get freedom through other peopleâs approval of how cool I am.Â
Maybe if I just get MORE words of affirmation, MORE validation from others that my work is valid, real, true, THEN, I will feel free.Â
Maybe if I just get more sales or make more money, or get a raise for a new job, THEN, I will be able to BUY free
...Ever think "I should have more followers?"â Or, âI should have more people on my list?â Or, âI should be making more money in my business?â
Then you may also be experiencing feelings ofâŠ
Overwhelm, anxiety, frustration, resentment, holding back tears, or screams, or rails at the high heavens for why are they so much farther along than you.
Listen...
Should-ing is soul-sucking.â â
If youâre stuck in comparison, beating yourself up for not being where you "should" be vs. where you are, showing up on social media...and, heck, just building a business can SUCK.â
Should-ing anything is contractive energy that ain't nobody got time for. â
Least of all you. And especially not your customers.Â
Everything is energy, after all.Â
And we feel it when you're putting on a show or trying to be like someone else, or posting with a đ©ton of "shoulds."
Your audience is smart. Like you.
And we KNOW, even when we canât put our finger on it when showing up is just a should instead of a service.Â
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