Addressing the Fear of Being Judged (aka Handling the Haters)
Are you scared of being judged? Ridiculed? Hated on? Ever think….
What will they think if I do…
What’ll they say if you share…
I could never do XYZ because then they would think...
First of all - who TF is this elusive “they” who are scaring you out of doing your soul work?
And secondly…
Look, Queen...
The ones who judge you, belittle you, mock you, aren’t the ones who are doing it.
You put yourself out there.
You do the freaking work.
You show up.
You dive in.
You go deep.
You face those f*cking demons.
You fight your own fears like a warrior as you march into the arena to claim your power.
Let the spectators say what they will.
The ones who judge you will NEVER be the ones who are doing it.
Now hear me out Queen, because it’s time for some tough love...
Judgment is NOT feedback, constructive criticism, or calling you on bullshit excuses.
That’s actually compassion.
That’s LOVE in action.
JUDGEMENT IS AN EXPECTATION OF WHO OR WHAT SOMETHING “SHOULD” IS “SUPPOSED” TO LOOK LIKE, BE LIKE/ SOUND LIKE/ FEEL LIKE.
It’s an external acceptance of something OUTSIDE of your soul.
When someone judges they are putting some internal desire, some perception of theirs, something that is probably already OUTSIDE of them and projecting that onto you.
It’s not you.
It’s THEIR perception.
And it’s THEIR projection of all the things and feelings they are currently feeling lost or unfulfilled, or needing validation for.
“HATERS,” THOSE WHO MOCK YOU AND BELITTLE YOU FOR DOING THE WORK - INNER WORK, OUTER WORK, BUSINESS WORK, WHATEVER - ARE NEVER THE ONES WHO ARE DOING IT.
They are safe -
Hidden away in the stands with their pork rinds and pot-bellied opinions.
Confined to seat 29A of their comfort zone.
They have one seat - you have the WHOLE ARENA!!!
YOU have all eyes on you!
No one is looking at them.
NO ONE MAY BE ROOTING AGAINST THEM, BUT NO ONE IS ROOTING FOR THEM EITHER.
YOU’RE the one out there doing the work.
YOU’RE the one who is taking the hits and getting back up, day in and day out.
So let the spectators, onlookers, bystanders, judgers, say what they may…
But until they choose to get into the GRIND with you, their opinion is only what you make it to mean.
Which for me means...
Unless you are choosing to go into the fray, into the wild, into the unknown…
Unless you have the courage to show up day in and day out…
Unless you are unwilling to settle for your own smallness and BS excuses…
Unless you are ready to challenge yourself to call out your limitations for what they are and freaking go for it…
Then, while we are grateful you are enjoying the show - your opinions just fade away into the rest of the roar of the crowd of people who are cheering ON those who are actually doing the dang thing.
A critic’s voice will always be drowned out by a creator’s roar, as she unleashes her greatness, her courage, her strength, her gifts into the world.
THERE IS NO COURAGE IN CRITICIZING.
Courage comes from creating something greater than you, beyond YOU.
Be it a business..
A baby…
A book…
Or banana-shaped pancakes for your kids.
Your courage to continue to create, to get into the arena, to be bold, to stand out, will always drown out with inspiration the muffled squawking of judgment.
Remember, your reign is now.
P.S. There’s a reason the players in the arena aren’t going up to that one guy - you know the guy - drunk, hurling insults at the quarterback, shaming him with “how could you miss that pass!” as he spills his beer onto the row below him.
Yeah, there’s a reason that after the game, the quarterback isn’t going up to THAT guy saying, “Hey, Mr. Drunk Insulting Man, you know, you’re right! How did I miss that pass? Please coach me on how I can do better in my game. Your insights are so valuable.”
That would be ridiculous!
There’s a reason why every great athlete has a professional coach to guide, assess, and evaluate their movements on the field.
But this is what so many entrepreneurs do in their business - they seek advice from all the wrong places - from the spectators, the onlookers, the bystanders, the crowd, the “accountability” group who is not really holding themselves accountable, let alone you.
You want someone who is in there with you, day in and day out - who gets how you operate, who can dissect the patterns that are holding you back, as well as the ones that are making you successful.
It’s not just the things they have, it’s who they BE in the process, and who they are BECOMING.
You want someone who is trained to guide, and assess, who knows how you move through and with your life - and who can steer you from that linebacker of doubt who’s right in your blindside every time you’re about to take the big leap.
Join the Visionary Voxer and get the support, coaching, guidance, mentorship from someone who’s IN the arena with you.
For all the deets and to register, click here to jump in.
This offer completely goes away on 5/12, so if you want to experience what having someone day in and day out in the arena with you, forging ahead, challenging you, championing you, and, yes (because I can’t help it) cheerleading you on to become your boldest, most fearless, more courageous self.
I’ve never offered ANYTHING like this before, and I don’t believe I ever will again...and especially not at this price.
So if this is calling to you, TRUST yourself. TRUST your gut. And have the courage to say “YES!”
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