Is Time Your Enemy or Your Ally? Reclaim Control Over Time with Your Mind

crown yourself podcast Feb 19, 2024


Please enjoy this transcript of the Crown Yourself Podcast, with your host, transformational story coach, Kimberly Spencer (@Kimberly.Spencer)

In this episode of the Crown Yourself podcast, host Kimberly Spencer explores the transformation from feeling oppressed by time to mastering it. She offers advice on using time as a supportive resource by aligning it with personal values and priorities. Spencer stresses the significance of recognizing life's current season and choosing activities that align with one's highest values, thereby managing time effectively and advancing toward goals. She advocates for a positive approach to deadlines and challenges, drawing from her own experiences, including her book-writing process, to illustrate the power of a constructive perspective on time for personal and professional development.

*Transcripts may contain typos. We do our best to catch any human or robot errors prior to release. And we thank you in advance for your understanding. Enjoy!

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Kimberly Spencer (00:00:00) - As this episode is about time and the illusion of time and the paradox of time that we're in this 3D reality, while also being spiritual, sovereign beings, I wanted to bring something forth that I am so honored and excited to create for you, with you at this time, as you lean in this year to claim your divine birthright. As you know, I've been doing one-on-one coaching for years. Nine years now with high achieving, visionary leaders, my clients have had multimillion dollars worth of results. They have achieved their one-year goals in three months of working with me. They've bought themselves a dream plane. They've healed their relationships with their children and their spouses or their ex-spouses. They have circumvented eating disorders and transcended old identities of who they once were and now are living lives that feel so aligned and purposeful. Is the gift and the joy that I am so excited to bring within this container of the Divine Birthright Mastermind. This is for you. If this year mediocrity just makes you want to vomit, and the idea of excuses instead of excellence is disgusting.

Kimberly Spencer (00:01:23) - Because this is your year that you're choosing instead of beating yourself down to build yourself up. This is the year that instead of limitations, you are seeing yourself as liberated to the divine potential that is within. This is for you if you're interested in creating holistic success this year with flow and harmony so that no longer is your business, the superstar of your life, but you are. So that no longer are you feeling icky, sacrificing time and energy with, with, and away from those that you love, and instead get to be in harmony in the dance of all of it. If you devour a good challenge for breakfast and you take it on, what was a problem that you would have, like, completely knocked you off your guard a year ago? And you take on that challenge and are like, game on, girlfriend, let's go. And then you take that impossible quote-unquote because we don't really believe in impossibility here and make it a reality. And then you take pictures of it and show it off on social media as a testimony of what's possible.

Kimberly Spencer (00:02:33) - And then, you know, maybe do a Ted talk on it and label it the same thing, because you can. This is for you. The goal of the Divine Birthright Mastermind is a deeply rooted, creative business owners who are multi-passionate and have multiple roles of equal importance. I mean, the role of mom and CEO is equally important. And this is for you if you no longer want to go. Climbing the mountain. Of both your business personal and your spiritual aligned success alone. And you want a community of like-minded individuals who are consciously, actively choosing to both create income and impact in a way that benefits themselves, their families, and the communities. This world needs your gifts more than ever. And as I've said before, the role of the visionary is not trained. It is not celebrated. We have been trained to be tacticians. This is a mastermind that will allow you to step in and live in the embodiment of that more feminine role of the visionary, while also applying the role of the integrator, of integrating all of the pieces of your life to function as one holistic symphony.

Kimberly Spencer (00:04:08) - If you're feeling called forth by this if you feel that this is the support that you need to guide you into your next level of love, abundance, prosperity, business visibility, and expansion, and growth into your highest and greatest potential in this year. You're in luck because Quantum Leap's happened to be my specialty. It would be my honor to guide you through the next 12 months in this sacred container of support, of belief, and of being able to see, as some of my clients have said, your highest and best and your greatest potential, maybe even before you can. If you need that light, that guidance, and a community around you to challenge you lovingly, to rise into your reign, to kick fear off your throne once again. Then let's do this together. I invite you to click below and join us inside the Divine Birthright Mastermind. We begin on February 2nd. And with that, let's go to the episode. Welcome to the Crown Yourself podcast, where together we build your empire and transform your subconscious stories about what's possible for your business, body, and life.

Kimberly Spencer (00:05:34) - I'm your host, Kimberly Spencer, founder of Crown Yourself.Com and I am a master mindset coach, bestselling author, and TEDx speaker, known to my clients as a game changer. Each week you get the conscious leadership strategies you need to help you reign with courage, clarity, and confidence so that you too, can make the income and impact you deserve. Imagine this podcast as your royal invitation to step into your full potential and reign in your divine purpose. Your sovereignty starts here and your reign is now. Hello my fellow sovereigns, and welcome back to another episode of the Crown Yourself podcast. Oh, it has been a holiday season to remember. Oh my goodness. Just being in our home, being in this sacred space that we have created and manifested. And it is coming up on our one-year anniversary in our house like bananas to think of. A year ago we were just moving from California, and then a year before that we were just moving from Australia. And finally, we have planted ourselves in our legacy home and it feels so good.

Kimberly Spencer (00:06:47) - And I am so honored to be here and so often in the beginning of the year, like we've talked about motivation and how things just feel. So just there is this infinite potential of what is available to us, and there always is. And yet so often I see so many people struggle with this concept and this illusion of time, of how do I, in the span of 24 hours, make the time to do all the things that I have to do? And I know you've heard it said that Beyonce has the same amount of time as you do, that the president has the same amount of time as you do, and that y'all have 24 hours in the day. And that is the great equalizer. And yes, it is. And yes, I also call absolute bullshit on that because Beyonce is not, you know, carefully curating her Canva images to make sure that she has the most perfect social media post ever in the history of graphic images. No, she has got a team, she has support, she has publicists and social media managers, and people on her PR team managing that.

Kimberly Spencer (00:07:59) - Same with the president, same with any influencer you see out there. For the most part, they have a team and support that support them in getting things done for their time. Like Beyonce does not even do her own makeup. She may on some days, but I have a doubt she does. So if you're spending the time to do your own makeup and you're spending the time to do your Canva graphic images or whatever you're doing in your business or in your life. Like I was working with one coach who was new and starting her business, and she was getting ready to do all of these new things in her business. And she was like, yeah, I spent three hours working on a logo, and I was like, why? Because when we really look at time and when we use this excuse of time. We live in a false reality. Time, just in general. It is a construct and an illusion. And simultaneously, in the paradox of this universe, it is not like also as a professional you want to respect people's time.

Kimberly Spencer (00:09:08) - You can't just like roll into a Zoom 30 minutes late and be like, oh, I've time starts when I do know you set an appointment and if there's an appointment, you show up to it. But there is a paradox of the creation of time that we need to live into in order to manifest the things that we want to manifest. So the belief, first and foremost, that we're going to dismantle today is I don't have the time, and I no longer say that that is something that literally is not in my vocabulary. And I, I do not use the words, I don't have the time and I do not use a phrase. I'm so busy and I've had so many people around me in my external circumstances say like, oh my gosh, you're so busy, I can't believe you're helping with this thing. And I'm like, yeah, but you will never, ever, ever hear me say, I am so busy. Because busy connotes and it has a presupposition attached to it that there is a capacity limit.

Kimberly Spencer (00:10:04) - Well, if we are made of being, if we are beings of infinite potential, then there is no capacity limit. Now, there may be a time constraint, there may be time capacity. But we're going to see today how there can be an infinite amount of time available to you right now. So first and foremost, I never say I don't have the time. I do say I don't. It's not a priority. So there are certain things for me that I prioritize, like time with my family. That's a non-negotiable time with my husband again, a non-negotiable time working with my clients. Non-negotiable. Like I love doing one-on-one work. It's not scalable. I know I've had many coaches say, oh, well, you know, do one too many. It's scalable. Yes. And I really, really love working one-on-one with the right people. Like, oh my gosh, do I. And it fuels my soul and it gets me curious and it gets me to be like a detective.

Kimberly Spencer (00:11:05) - So I love it. But I never say I don't have the time. I say it's not a priority. I also never say that to my children either. Like I don't say, I don't have the time for that. I say it's not a priority right now for me to look at your space app for the 50th time today. It is a priority right now to do something else sometimes. So looking at how are you languaging time? Because time is very easy to. Language in limitation. And it's one that society regularly does with constraints of like, oh, you're so busy, or oh, you're so overwhelmed and all of those. We have a presupposition around capacity, the amount of time, and how much stuff you can fit into the 24 hours that we have today. So in order to dismantle this belief, we have to look around, look at, and look around our beliefs around time. So if you've been saying to yourself recently, I'm so busy, I'm so overwhelmed. I have so much to do.

Kimberly Spencer (00:12:16) - Yes, that may be true. And there is a version of you in the quantum realm that is literally like laughing. Like, oh, that's so cute. Do you think that's a lot of stuff? Like, really like, oh my gosh. I look back to what I told my husband when I first started crying myself back in 2014, and 2015 when we literally made like $100 in one year. Oh yeah, big, big bucket. And that year I was on my computer all the time. All the time. My husband had a joke that I couldn't watch a Netflix show with him within 15 minutes of sitting down, because we would used to sit down and have dinner in front of Netflix, and that would be our time. Especially, um, after Declan was born. I didn't do it as much after he was born, but definitely like before he was born, he would be like, we sit down, we have dinner, I would inhale my dinner, and then. The computer would open up.

Kimberly Spencer (00:13:23) - And just recently we had a project that I was wrapping up with my team, and my husband was like, he saw me coming out. And I said, you know what, honey? I'm this is this doesn't happen that often, but it is it is happening. And he's like, oh, it's.

Kimberly Spencer (00:13:37) - Coming out, the laptop is coming back.

Kimberly Spencer (00:13:40) - And I was like, yes. And this, you know, this is like a very rare occasion that that happens. But we were on a deadline. I wanted to make sure I honored my integrity and the commitment to my client to complete that project within the time that I had said. So, I was willing to bust out my computer while Netflix was on in the background to check on the scope of the project and make sure that everything was going according to plan. That being said, it's a rarity. But it used to be a commonality because I was under this belief of time and I was in this belief of overwhelm and having to be busy.

Kimberly Spencer (00:14:23) - And I have no idea, in all honesty, what the fuck I was doing. To be firmly frank with you. Because I look back and I was like, what was I doing that was taking so much time but not actually producing any results? So when looking at leveraging time, we want to look at time as our ally, and so much of our language around time constrains it into the position of the enemy. It makes time for the villain. And time is not the villain. It's not the bad guy. But if you look at how you're constraining time. And putting it in the villain role, which thus means you're in the victim role. You're the victim of time, so you're not having enough time to do all the things that you want to get done. Sometimes that comes to a belief, like most often, that comes to a belief in not-enoughness, that there is somewhere in you a belief of not being enough, not being able to do enough, and thus that also believe that belief comes down to lack of trust, lack of trusting that what you did today mattered so much that you could be done within an hour.

Kimberly Spencer (00:15:39) - Like, what if there were those projects that literally you could take an hour of your time and look at the skill set of your genius zone and literally be able to say, within an hour, I did it. I did everything at the highest level, in my highest capacity and my highest state of genius, and then passed it off to the rest of the team. So we have to look at how we're language in time to be the villain of our circumstances, which allows us to be in that very comfortable victim role that society is happy to have us in. But you lose your sovereignty when you do that. So to claim our sovereignty with time, it means we have to make time our ally. So if we think of the drama triangle that I know I've spoken on before, then in the drama triangle, the victim can become the creator. The villain can become the challenger, the loving challenger, or the disrupter of systems. And then the hero, which is the third point of the drama triangle, can become the coach.

Kimberly Spencer (00:16:42) - So. You have the opportunity to either coach yourself or you can work with a coach like me. I'm happy to work with you through time in a consult, and how to construct and consult you on time so that time becomes your ally, I hope you will be able to get the framework, at least from this podcast, so that you can take time to be your ally and then turn that ally into working for you, not against you. Because, no, remember, we're not fighting against time anymore. We are the creators. So when we frame ourselves, when we move from the victim role of time to being the creator, then that suddenly means that we are the creator of time. Well, do we really create more hours in the day? No, we create time for our priorities. And this is where your values come into play. Knowing your priorities means knowing what you value. If your time feels scarce, a lot of time means that you are curating your time to be against the shoulds of everybody else's schedule.

Kimberly Spencer (00:17:53) - And that's just not the way a queen does things. So to shift from being the victim of time to being a creator of time, means you filter time through the value system of your priorities. What is the highest priority value for you in this season of your life right now? Now. You know, I've, I've said multiple times that the quality of your life is determined by the quality of your questions. That is from Richard Strait, from Doctor Richard Bandler, the founder of NLP. What is the highest value priority for you in this season of your life right now? That question. Breaks it down into three parts, and breaks time into three parts. So one, the season of your life. We're going to work it backward. The last part of the question is the season of your life. You will have seasons. As we've discussed on this podcast before, of winter, of spring, of summer, where things are hot and passionate and heavy, of winter where things may be a little bit more dormant, a little bit more still, but there is still life underneath the snow.

Kimberly Spencer (00:19:00) - So looking at what is a season that you're in, in your life and in your business and in your relationships right now and then what is the highest value for this season? So let's say, for example, you're in winter and sales are a little slow right now. And right now your winter is constituting of really putting in the groundwork for building a new network so you can reach a new ideal customer avatar so that you can reach more people come spring. So the highest value for your business would then be connection community or retention. So it's laying the groundwork for the foundation of that network that will blossom in the spring with heaps of sales. Maybe you're in the season of winter with your body, and your priority is not necessarily to be hitting it hard and going at it every single day with the gym and the weeds and the, you know, personal best, you know, hitting your PBS's or your peers. I don't know which one it is. It's a PR personal record in marathon running or personal best in weight training.

Kimberly Spencer (00:20:14) - I don't do much weight training, but I do do marathon running. But I don't strive for a PR. I strive to complete the marathon in my highest and best way. But maybe this season of your life is not meant to be going for those PRs or those PPVs. Maybe it's just meant to be in slow, gentle movement to reregulate your nervous system. Um, maybe you haven't had a health scare or a health crisis like I did last year when I found out that my cortisol was off the charts and I was deeply struggling with mono, like, mono came back all summer and I was like, whoop! And I, who have I been making out with? It's just been Spike, what the heck? And that being said, like when I found that out, I was like, oh, my body had no desire to hit it hard with weights or working out or running. It just wanted slow, gentle, regulating movement. Pilates. I did some pure bar. Still love the pure bar, but I did a lot of pilates.

Kimberly Spencer (00:21:19) - You got back to my yoga so I could have that slow, gentle movement because it was not the season for high-intensity workouts. So recognizing what season correlates to what value correlates to what is the priority for that value. So let's say the value right now for your business is visibility. And the season that you're in is in this really expansive spring season where you're just blossoming and showing yourself to the world, showing your gifts of your business, to the world. You are in a season of visibility, and thus that value is visibility. And then the priority then would be chunked down to what are those tasks. Those. Activities in your business that you or somebody else that you could outsource to. Doing that would allow you to be visible and then visible. For what purpose is it for just growing your impact, growing your numbers, growing your followership, growing your sales? And so that's when then from there, the tactics of visibility if your highest value right now is visibility.

Kimberly Spencer (00:22:32) - Then what would trickle down into the priorities and into the tactics and the tasks of the day that you actually make time for that you create time for would then be things like podcast guesting or getting PR or getting you featured on news outlets, or doing joint venture cross-brand promotions with other brands that are of similar interests and values, and that would value you being a contributor to support you in growing your visibility and support them and growing theirs. So that is how you filter time to then be the creator of time because then you know that the time that you want to spend is filtering through that value system of visibility into the priorities of the activities that actually get you visible. Which then would be the task that you do that you leave on your to-do list. So it's not then that you don't have time. Let's say, for example, take another business example that your highest priority value is income. Like let's be real, sometimes that is a high priority value. So then it's not that you don't have the time, it's that you have to filter everything through.

Kimberly Spencer (00:23:46) - Is it generating income for me and my business or is it not? Because if it's not, then it's a hobby. And that's okay. It's great to have hobbies, but we have to be real about what's actually a business, what's sustaining the business entity, and the ecosystem that we're building, which is cash flow and what is the fluff. And then leveraging time in the context of the drama triangle as we become the creators of time, as we filter time through this question so that we're no longer the victim of time, but we're the creator of our time, and we look at time in the seat of the empowered challenger. So it's no longer the villain, but it's now moved into the empowered role, into the positive role in the drama, in the flipped drama triangle, where it's no drama, drama triangle because you're the creator of your circumstances. Time then becomes the great challenger. So this is when deadlines become fun. Like, I am writing my new book that is coming out this year in March called Make Every Podcast Want You How to Become so Radically Interesting You'll Barely Keep from Interviewing Yourself.

Kimberly Spencer (00:24:54) - And time has been so fun because I know as a mother of two young kids, there is time that I have to create, and I had to find and I had to like, make space for in my schedule to do this creation. My book became like my lover, and I had to find time to see that. And it became like this romance where I got to seek out and source time and see, like, when could I just make a quick getaway and just see them for an hour and I get to like, that was the love and the excitement and the challenge that I got to write through, which made it so much more fun and interesting. And obviously, Spike was incredibly supportive of me loving on my love of writing. So it was it helps to have a great support network as well. Oh, Bobby's Colton has joined me for the rest of the podcast recording. You woke up a little early from his nap, so you are just kind of cuddling on me right now, which is sweet.

Kimberly Spencer (00:25:58) - And again, and a prime example as well of time. Right? Because what is a priority for me? Well, recording this podcast is supporting my son and making sure that he feels loved and cared for. And so then if we look at the drama triangle through the lens of time, we have that third piece of the triangle, which is. In the drama cycle. It is the hero, aka the co-dependent or the enabler, and in the positive form of drama, it is the coach. And so it is your higher self that gets to coach you. Like what is the value of what it is that you how you are looking at time? It is your higher self that gets to guide you. Or I mean you can always work with a coach like I've said, who gets to guide you in seeing. How are you leveraging time? What are you believing about time? What are the beliefs about time that you currently have that are blocking you from receiving what it is that you want to receive and do with your time that aligns with your greater purpose? And then how can you better support yourself to grow to that next level, where there's an even greater relationship with time? So a few beliefs that I have around time are one.

Kimberly Spencer (00:27:23) - I am the creator of my time. And two I am time. Time flows through me and I use time as my asset. Time is my friend. Yeah. Time is like the growth friend that will call you on your own bbs and be like - girl, you trippin' right now. Like you're you're making excuses for yourself. Come on. And it will lovingly challenge me to grow and grow faster and farther because that is what a true friend of time gets to be for me. That is how I pivoted my entire relationship with time so that I have the time to take a nap, to have a meditation every day, spend time with my kids, write a book run businesses coach my clients to book my clients on podcasts, and to manage a team. That is how it's it's not because I am like super magical with time, I'm just an Alchemist. My belief systems pivoted my will so that I focused on time in a new way.

Kimberly Spencer (00:28:34) - I changed my relationship with time. And if you're struggling with managing your time, it is not time that you manage. It's yourself. You have to change your relationship both with yourself and how you interact and engage with time. Because when you pivot your relationship with time, that is when you start to see magical quantum leaps happen because you become that creator. And you get to coach yourself from that highest and best, most sovereign perspective on how to leverage the power of time. Because she can be your greatest ally your greatest asset, and one of your greatest motivators should you choose to harness her in the positive realm of the drama triangle. So with that being said, if you love this episode, definitely share it on your Insta stories. I love it when you take a screenshot of it and share it, right? Yeah, and if you want to learn how to better leverage time and manage yourself through time, then click the button down below and register for a one-on-one. Consult with me and we will look at how you are leveraging and managing time so that you can be best supported.

Kimberly Spencer (00:29:55) - Right buddy? Yeah yeah yeah. And with that, my fellow sovereigns on your throne. Mind your business because your reign is on. Now can you say your reign is now? Yeah, yeah, reign is now. Good job. Good job buddy. All right, see you next time. Thank you so much for tuning in today. If what you heard resonated with you, be sure to subscribe and start creating a bigger impact now by sharing this with a friend. Just by doing that one simple act of kindness, you are creating a royal ripple to support more people in their sovereignty. And if you're not already following on social media, connect with me everywhere at Crown Yourself Now for more inspiration. I am so excited to connect with you in the next episode, and in the meantime, go out there and create a body, business, and life that rules because today you crown yourself.

The Crown Yourself Podcast is a fast-growing self-improvement podcast, ranked in the top #200 personal-development podcasts in two countries, so far,  out of 4.5 million podcasts. Each week, you get the conscious leadership strategies you need to help you reign with courage, clarity, and confidence so that you too can make the income and impact you deserve. Imagine this podcast as your royal invitation to step into your full potential and reign in your divine purpose. To listen to any of the past episodes for free, check out this page.




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