Becoming: From Chaos to Crowned

Please enjoy this transcript of the Crown Yourself Podcast, with your host, transformational story coach, Kimberly Spencer (@Kimberly.Spencer)

In this episode of the Crown Yourself podcast, host Kimberly Spencer explores the theme of personal transformation. She shares her own experiences and insights on the journey toward becoming the person you aspire to be. Kimberly discusses the phases of desiring change, actively pursuing it, and finally embodying the new identity. She offers advice on overcoming obstacles and maintaining progress. Additionally, Kimberly introduces her Divine Birthright Mastermind program, aimed at those seeking comprehensive success and personal growth. The program promises to support individuals in enhancing their mindset, skills, and overall life through a blend of energetic and practical approaches.

*Transcripts may contain typos. We do our best to catch any human or robot errors prior to release. And we thank you in advance for your understanding. Enjoy!

Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music, Stitcher, iHeartRadio, or your favorite podcast platform. And, you can always watch the episode on YouTube here.





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Crown Yourself LLC and Kimberly Spencer own the copyright in and to all content in and transcripts of the Crown Yourself podcast, with all rights reserved, as well as outright of publicity.

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We good? Great. Let's get to the goods.



Kimberly Spencer (00:00:07) - Welcome to the Crown Yourself podcast, where together we build your empire and transform your subconscious stories about what's possible for your business, body, and life. I'm your host, Kimberly Spencer, founder of CrownYourself.Com and I'm a master mindset coach, best-selling author, and TEDx speaker known to my clients as a game changer. Each week you get the conscious leadership strategies you need to help you reign with courage, clarity, and confidence so that you too, can make the income and impact you deserve. Imagine this podcast as your royal invitation to step into your full potential and rein in your divine purpose. Your sovereignty starts here and your reign is now. Hello, my fellow sovereigns, and


Kimberly Spencer (00:00:51) - Welcome back to another episode of the Crown Yourself podcast. I am so honored by your reviews and your shares of this podcast which has grown exponentially in the past year. I am so honored for where we are going this year with this podcast, and for all the juicy, amazing things I have planned. I entered 2024 not as I had necessarily hoped like it was a phenomenal new year.


Kimberly Spencer (00:01:25) - We sat on the couch and we had steak and ice cream and chocolate and champagne, and we watched The Greatest Showman and Frozen Two, and it was great. Obviously, the kids didn't have champagne, but they did stay up with us actually until midnight, which was a shocker, especially for my little two-year-old. And I was so grateful like I was so deeply in reverence for the experience of being able to, like, get grounded in the foundation of our first year, our first New Year celebration in our home like we were celebrating not only. Our first new year is. But like in our home. But like this is the new year that we're going to be living in our home for a whole year. And just being able to do that on the couch with my kids in my jammies, sipping on some Veuve, and enjoying just the joy of The Greatest Showman, which is my favorite movie by far. It was something that I. I felt that every single former version of me was so proud of myself for that moment.


Kimberly Spencer (00:02:41) - And that's why today I really wanted to come on and dive into a concept that is on becoming and is on the identity of who you want to become because we know that you don't get what you want and you get who you are. And in order to get what you want, it's about evolving who you are to be a vibrational match for what it is that you want. But what does that mean? And I mean, I can tell you if you man, if you told me in 2016 when my goal was to have my million dollar year and that was my goal, and have a baby, my first baby, um, I was enrolled in a business coaching program. They're like, what do you want? Who do you have to become? Here's like, here are your manifestations. Jump up and down, and say your affirmations. And I was jumping and I was journaling and I was writing like crazy. And I was also so paralyzed with fear. Paralyzed because in 2017, when my son was born, the experience shook me to my core.


Kimberly Spencer (00:03:51) - It brought up all of my childhood insecurities, all of my childhood trauma. It brought forth all of the fears that I had, like the deeply held fears that suddenly and I know I've talked about this on a past podcast episode suddenly just hit me in the face when, with my son, and with this genetic diagnosis that just smacked at my deepest core, fear of being fundamentally flawed. And my son is fine. Like six years later, he's fine, he's doing great. He's thriving, he's enjoying life. But back then, I did not know how much deep inner work I had. So no matter how many affirmations are much jumped up and down I could do, my nervous system would not have been regulated to be able to sustain $1 million a year. Because there are layers to becoming. In general, when I see that someone is not getting what they want in their life and their business with their finances, then it comes down to these layers and it also comes down to what are they tolerating in their situation. So when we look at these layers of becoming, the first one is wanting to want.


Kimberly Spencer (00:05:20) - And when I look back to who I was in 2017, I was wanting to want to have all those goals of the million dollar goals and all that. I wanted to want those, but I wasn't in a place that was personally developed to actually sustain and receive those. And that's that's a huge piece to understand. Is that your level of power we've heard the phrase like money is power. Um, it's simply money is a form of energy, and power is an example of energy. So when we think about money as being power, it's only because it is a powerful energy and vibration. And it's like if your body was struck by lightning, right? Like your body wouldn't actually be able to physically sustain that amount of power going through your body. That's why if you look at lottery winners, they win a bajillion dollars. And then suddenly within like a few short years, they're completely broke or they're back to where they started. So there is the identity of wanting to want something.


Kimberly Spencer (00:06:37) - This could be because you've externalized somebody else's goal. This could be because you're you see a goal that somebody else has and you're thinking, oh, I should have that. I should want that. I, I am a business owner and that's why I loved my interview with, uh, Emma Vega Malta and how she was going for her seven-figure year. And she realized that she was actually really quite happy with a multi-six-figure business that just really sustained and took care of her clients and allowed her to have a really full, beautiful life. So I'll link to that episode below because I really think it's a valuable episode to understand. Like, ah, the things that you say that you want, are they actually something that you do want? Are they actually something that you do want to sustain, to receive, to have to grow? And is that in alignment with where you are now in your personal and spiritual development? Like I can definitely say for certain, but, back in 2017, $1 million was not it would have been hitting, I would have been hit by lightning like it would not.


Kimberly Spencer (00:07:46) - I was not in the space to receive that, to have that, to sustain that. So. We want to look at, then that next layer of just wanting. So wanting it does mean you're in that stage of striving. It does mean you're in that stage of actively doing your exploring. And I know in past podcast episodes I've talked about the the four learning stages. So we have unconscious incompetence, which is the first one where you don't know what you don't know, but you think you know it all. And then you have the second layer of learning, which is conscious incompetence, where you know that you don't know something and you're trying to figure it out, but you're figuring out the mistakes that you're making after you make the mistakes. And then we move to that level of conscious competence, which is the level where you are able to identify the potential pitfall before it happens. Or like, right, as it's about to happen and you stop and you hit the brakes and you say, nope, not going there because you know, the trend, the pattern, the vibration, the frequency, the experience, the habit as to where it's going.


Kimberly Spencer (00:09:01) - So that is a stage of wanting. Is that dance in the in-between, between conscious incompetence and conscious competence, where you're in a space of striving, you're actively doing your exploring, you're testing, you're experimenting, you're growing, you're failing, you're making the mistakes. You are falling in your face. You are succeeding in picking yourself back up. And that is a stage that requires the most amount of endurance. It really does. It's it involves so much grit to be able to grow through that, instead of taking the default armoring position that our egos love to have in, our egos are getting battered and bruised and broken. Um, along the way, instead of taking that armoring position it is actually about. Expanding even more into love, even more into seeing the opportunity through the crisis or the challenge or the problem. It's even more about how is this growing me through this. What is this eye of the needle that I need to thread myself into to be able to transform? What is the chrysalis that I get to go into, to transform and be transmuted from a caterpillar into a butterfly? What is that space? And that space is uncomfortable because sometimes it will require stillness, like so often when we're wanting where in that space of the mistakes and the doing, the striving and the going for it.


Kimberly Spencer (00:10:34) - But. There's also the requirement for moments of stillness because then you have the third layer of becoming the third level, which is embodiment. And if you think about that third level of being fully embodied, it means you are a vibrational match for what it is that you say that you want. You are operating as if the person and version of you, your higher self, your sovereign self who is operating as your highest self. Who is already embodied, who's already done the thing that you want to do? Well, she's not wondering, like, how do I do this? What do I do? Oh my gosh, I failed at this. No. Like she's looking at the failures that she had and it's like, oh, that that small thing was a problem for me. Oh that's that's like child's play now. So I look back on my journey as a business owner, to give you an example. There were certain struggles that I would have early on if I received a negative email or a hate comment, it would just paralyze me.


Kimberly Spencer (00:11:47) - I would be so scared. I would be avoidant. I wouldn't want to deal with it. I'd I'd freak out. I'd have anxiety. I'd feel just this like crippling anxiety about, you know, responding or what to do or how to how to circumvent this, how to how to alkalis us, how to make it so that this was not a problem or that it didn't destroy everything. And it makes me think of my six-year-old, um, who I just love. But then the drama at six, it's like there's such a short lifespan. And so when you think of something, it's like, this is gonna destroy everything that I worked for. And it's like, no, that it's it's one hater. Like, it's really it's really not a big deal. Um, and I just, I just have such compassion and love for my six-year-old who I'm seeing that that personified through. And I'm like, oh, I'm so glad I, I healed those parts of me that were just like the excessive, extreme level of drama where one hateful comment is like, that's going to destroy my reputation because poor Declan, he's like, when he gets, you know when he gets a punishment or like loses his iPad, he's like forever.


Kimberly Spencer (00:12:59) - Am I losing it forever? And and I'm like, no, dude, you're losing him for 24 hours. Like, that's that's the consequence of the actions of what you did. Um, but that the whole timeline and the perception of infinity and that like 24 hours to a six-year-old is like an eternity. And the same with ours. And so this is where the inner child healing really gets to come in, not only with parenting but also with as we grow and evolve, we're going to see those moments where we're not acknowledging that very dramatic inner child whose timeline was so short that everything seems so monumental. And that's where we get to look and hold her and heal her and or him and honor him and just give them so much love and nurture them as that parent to our own inner child. And this is where you really get to grow when you start when you're in that space of wanting, you're going and you're failing and you're facing those problems and you're facing those challenges, and you get to parent yourself and recognize, hey, like, this is not it's not the end of the world.


Kimberly Spencer (00:14:13) - It's everything's going to be okay. It's a hiccup. It's a blip. It's not even this giant big thing. Because when we start accessing that higher self, that future self is our guide. That allows us to be in greater relationships with others. The embodiment, helps us to then better embody and model her because it is our inner child that needs that healing and space in order to have the full becoming. So every problem, every issue, every challenge that comes in the space of when you're seeing all the things that you want to create and do and be and have. When you are faced with those challenges. That's when you have the opportunity to parent yourself through that problem and be the guide who's like, look, I know 24 hours to you seems like an eternity. But I promise you, in the grand scheme of things, you probably won't even remember this in a week. It's a blip. And as long as we learn the learning lessons of what not to do in the future of what we can do better, then that's how we make those.


Kimberly Spencer (00:15:37) - Micro adjustments along the way to grow, evolve, and become and fully embody that future version of ourselves who already has, does, and is everything that we want to be doing. So I want you to look at all the goals that you have for 2024. And I know if you're driving like no need to pull them out or anything, but just think of one. And where are you on the scale of becoming it? Is it wanting to want, or is it a goal that you feel like you've been told you should have and you're like wanting to want it, but you don't really want it? You'll know when you're wanting to want a goal when you see others have it. And you should yourself. Oh, I should have that. I should be there by now. Well, you're not, because the only place to grow is from acceptance from that space of not should. It's not in the past or in the future. It's not. It's not in a state of guilt or shame.


Kimberly Spencer (00:16:43) - It's from an acceptance of like that is something that I do deeply want. I recognize that the thing that I want is not actually in my awareness and consciousness right now, and I am choosing to go through and go for this desire and let it evolve me and grow me for the highest and best good of all involved. And that's how you quickly move through the wanting to want to, the wanting to the embodying. So when you think of that goal you have, are you in the space of shooting yourself? And if you're in the goal, if you're in the space of wanting and you're in that layer of becoming, of wanting, meaning you're striving, you're doing, you're actively exploring. A lot of times, especially for high achievers, the wanting stage is coupled with a lot of busyness. There's a lot of movement. There is a lot of generating. There's a lot of generation, but there's not so much time to step back and work on the plan, work on the strategy, work on the overall vision, and hold that higher vision for what your desire is to create.


Kimberly Spencer (00:18:03) - So in order to move from wanting and to embodying, not only does it take nurturing your inner child, but it also takes. Seeing what it is that you want, and then really chunking up to that 40,000-foot view. Understanding why you want it really deeply. Why do you want it? And from there. Operating with service and looking at holding the vision. As to who do you need to become? To already have it and then start acting as her. And that doesn't mean journaling it out or affirmations or all of that can work if it works for you. What it does mean is, if your future self like, yes, there will be moments where you'll be in a state or in a space of push or powerful passion and like almost obsession, and you're just going for it and you're just driving forward. But make sure that there are those moments of stillness so that you can ensure that the plane is not getting off course from the destination. That with all the adjustments and micro adjustments and dealing with, you know, weather and things that happen as a pilot does, a pilot doesn't necessarily think they're off track if they hit a storm.


Kimberly Spencer (00:19:29) - And sometimes when we're in the wanting stage when we hit a storm, we think, oh, that's that means I'm off track. No, not necessarily. Sometimes that storm is something that you need to go through to get to your destination. So it's up to you to check your navigation to make sure you are on track with your why, with what it is that you want, with the alignment behind that, and who you're becoming. And then what do you have to be to go through that? To go through that storm to weather the storm. Do you have to be flexible? Adaptable? Maybe. Pivot. Recheck. Go around it, go above it, go below it. Typically in flying, there is the need to go above the problem, go above the storm. So how do you get yourself above the storm? Well, it comes back to that vision peace of being able to hold a vision higher and beyond the feeling of the problem and how you get above the problem. As you actually look at the problem, you know that the problem is there.


Kimberly Spencer (00:20:43) - And then you look above to the opportunity that's providing you, and you lean into the opportunity for the growth and you pull that throttle. I think it is. Um, I'm not a pilot yet, so we're going to learn that is a goal, though, in the next decade. And you pull whatever need to pull to get yourself above the storm and into the space of seeing the opportunity into the space of allowing it to grow you and lift you up into a higher realm of consciousness. And from there you then sustain weather the storm, and then you come down through the clouds. Make sure that you're still on the right. Navigation. I'm still on the right path. And come back to your destination. And that is where you're starting to embody it. It does require you to pull up. It does require, in that wanting stage, to pull above the problem to another state of consciousness, of acceptance. So you're not trying to deny that the storm is there? You're very aware that it's there.


Kimberly Spencer (00:21:48) - You're not trying to circumvent it. You're not trying to go around it. You are choosing to go above it to see. How it's there for you to allow you to evolve. You're choosing to be flexible, adaptable, maybe even coachable. Hopefully coachable. And. In order to get what you need, get the space, get the safety in that space of acceptance and neutrality. We're not being tossed about by the storm in order to come back down through the clouds. Once. Once you've passed overhead, the storm. Because then you land into the embodiment. Into that space where there is so much trust in what is unfolding, where there is so much trust in what is unfolding. And you already know in your gut, heart, and brain how to navigate that storm so that you don't have to consciously think about, oh my gosh, now I need to pull up and I need to get above the storm. And how do I get around it? No, it just is natural. Like, oh, that's the next move.


Kimberly Spencer (00:23:04) - Okay. We're just going to go up a little higher because your future self is looking at the problems from six months ago, a year ago, five years ago, and they are so piddly and small and sad that she handles us with ease like it's not even an issue for her. And that's where we want to get you to. And so if you'd like this level of support from consciousness, from creating holistic success. I am creating something that I am so excited to invite you to. It is the Divine Birthright mastermind. This is for you. If mediocrity makes you want to vomit, if you know that you're here to break the mold, if you actually need strategy and shifts and actual tools that will help you shift your limiting beliefs, move beyond them. Not just like let's give you some good vibes and energy, which I'm all about good vibes and energy. But like we also need energy. Embodiment of that energy. And then the strategy. If you're seeking holistic success, meaning life and business and babies and fur babies and love life and home life and environment in your body and your health is all thriving, all operating in glorious synergy.


Kimberly Spencer (00:24:31) - If you want a muse, a guide, a coach with nine years of experience serving high-performing leaders with multi-million dollars in results for her clients and 16 years of experience as an entrepreneur. If you desire a combination of energetic and practical strategies to take your life and business to the next level. If you devour a good challenge for breakfast and you take on what you thought six months ago was impossible, make it a reality and then take pictures of it and show it off on social media as a testimony for all of what is possible. If that is you and you're like, Holy crap, yes, that sounds like me. I could totally be up to that. If you're willing to collaborate like a mofo and you're willing to experiment trying new strategies, tactics, and habits and see what can work for you and where you want to go. If you're open and generous and vulnerable and sovereign in your choices. If you're willing to be generous and share generously with your fellow sovereigns within this container, then I would love to invite you into the Divine Birthright.


Kimberly Spencer (00:25:40) - I will leave a link below in the description. If you're feeling called go forth and really claim this because this is something new. I am so honored. I've been coaching one on one for nine years now, and it's been a hot minute since I've done a group coaching program of this caliber where we are going to be doing coaching to take your mindset and your skill set, and your systems and your branding and your marketing and your sales and your vision and your team and your data and your visibility to the next level. You're going to be brainstorming with connections, and you're going to be growing your visibility, getting the deep work get shit done time where you can actually do the most courageous and game-changing work on the physical plane, embodied as your sovereign self who already has doesn't, is what it is you want to be, do, and have. So we're going to take you through those moments. Like if there are things and projects that you've been avoiding and you're like, oh no, I'll just put it out to tomorrow, I'll do it, I'll do it tomorrow.


Kimberly Spencer (00:26:43) - I'll do it tomorrow. Yeah. That shit's going to be cut out real quick. So we're going to have a get shit done office hour, where we will literally go through a practice to embody. And then all of those things that you've been avoiding. And I know we're going to we're going to get to face that. We're gonna get to face that. But you won't have to do it alone. You'll get to face it together within this container of sovereign leaders who are choosing to rise. I am so excited for this mastermind. This is something that I have desired to create as a sacred container to just hold. The growth and expansive potential for the powerful energy of the visionary leader and combining it with the masculine strategy. And the structure. And having that feminine flow and power from that space of the visionary, which is where you sit on your throne and claim your divine birthright. I will leave a link in the description. If this feels aligned for you, then I look forward to seeing you inside of the Divine Birthright this year.


Kimberly Spencer (00:27:56) - And with that, as always, if this podcast serves you, please share it with a friend who is on a similar journey of evolution and growing into their sovereignty and their true rooted power in their own internal revolution against fear. I am so honored to be here on this podcast to serve you. Thank you so much for your time, your energy, your patience, your listening, your attention, and all of the energy that you've given this podcast. I honor you and I thank you so much for it. As always, on your throne. Mind your business because your reign is now.


Kimberly Spencer (00:28:33) - Thank you so much for tuning in today. If what you heard resonated with you. Be sure to subscribe and start creating a bigger impact now by sharing this with a friend. Just by doing that one simple act of kindness, you are creating a royal ripple to support more people in their sovereignty. And if you're not already following on social media, connect with me everywhere at Crown Yourself Now for more inspiration. I am so excited to see you in the next episode! So February 2nd will be your first day.


Kimberly Spencer (00:29:00) - Go out there and create a body in business and life that rules. Because today sacred crown of this container.


Kimberly Spencer (00:29:07) - Of sovereigns that if it feels aligned. I am so excited to invite you in. Thank you so much for being a part of the Crown Yourself community and of this podcast, I am so excited for what 2024 has in store for all of us.

The Crown Yourself Podcast is a fast-growing self-improvement podcast, ranked in the top #200 personal-development podcasts in two countries, so far,  out of 4.5 million podcasts. Each week, you get the conscious leadership strategies you need to help you reign with courage, clarity, and confidence so that you too can make the income and impact you deserve. Imagine this podcast as your royal invitation to step into your full potential and reign in your divine purpose. To listen to any of the past episodes for free, check out this page.


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